When life gives you lemons squirt the juices in yo
by fox-firechick
Summary: Kagome's life is a living hell! Her mom's a slutty,drug addicted hooker,her dad's a drunked moron who beats her sensless every day,and leaves her to care for her yoiunger brother. She's ignored in school,when she's not being ridiculed. So what's she to do
1. unloved unwanted

Chapter 1

Kagome looked around. The coast was clear. This way,she would be able to get breakfast before going to school.

Slowly tip-toeing past her parent's room,she enterd Sota's.

"Sota",she whisperd softly,shakeing him a bit,"Sota wake up".

"Hmm",he murmerd,opening one eye,flinching invonertarily.

"Sota,is ok it's okay,now wake up",Kagome whisperd.

He looked up at his sister,takeing her extended hand and lifting himself up.

"What is it?",he asked as they enterd the kitchen downstairs.

"Breakfast",she awnserd quickly,"but be quiet,or mom and dad'l wake up".

Sota nodded in understanding. Today was going to be risky. Kagome was acctually going to try to get the two of them lunch and breakfast.

She looked left. She looked right. And she looked inside of an old blue oven mitt. Carefully reaching inside past the mousetraps,she grabbed some bills and coins,and after slipping some in her pocket,handed the rest to Sota.

So Kagome then went over to the fridge,and grabbed two eggs and a two strips of Bacon,slapping them onto a heated frying pan.

Ok,now for everyone who dosn't get whats up with the whole spy act,here's how it goes.

Kagome and Sota are living in a house with their mother and their father. Their father is a crack addicted alchoholic,and her mother is a weeded whore / prostetute.

A few minuets later, as the bacon was done, the trwo of them heard foot steps on the stairs.THeir parent's had awoken,so they each grabbed a poptart from the pantry and high tailded it out of there. They knew it wasn't smart to be eating without their parents permission,heak,it wasn't allowed to breath without their parents permission!!

They had made it to the mailbox,by the time they heard the POed sound of their fathers voice yelling numerous curse words.

( A/N : for all of you who don't kno, PO stands for pissed off )

Kagome sighed.She hadn't had time to brush her hair this morning,or wash her face,or even get dressed,so now she was a 14 yr. old girl,with terriably messed up black hair,bad breath,half awake,walking down the street,in a blue cotten shirt with the words SWEET written across it,with the matchind enssombal of some long,blue,cotten,pajama pants,speakled with bright pick cotten candy!!!! As she approched the school,she quickly ran her fingers through her hair in hopes of getting it to calm down. It didn't work.

'What the hell does it matter?',she asked herself. 'It not like anybody care wut the invissiable geek looks like!'

And she was right. Sure she got snickers,laughes,pointed fingers,spitballs,paper balls,everything usually reserved for subs,but hey,what else was new?

And with that,she walked into first hour.

Itwas a curse,pure and simple curse,that on teh first day,of this new school year,that Kikyo had to be in her home room class! The girl that hated her guts,the biggest,bitcheyist girl in the whole damned school!

Along with her BF INuyasha. NO this year wasn't going to be good !

Kagome looked around. There was a seat,far in the back where she could sit. By herself,secluded,locked away from the world. Just the way her life was sopposed to be!

And that's how the rest of her day went. All alone,in the back of all 7 classes,by herself.

She looked around at the lunch area. It was big and spacious. Empty.It was at least three hours after school,and she hadn't gone home. She had some money,her poptart,only half eaten.She wasn't about to go home any time soon. Her dad was totaly pissed at her,her mom was out with some guy named Joe,probably prepareing to bear his child.

"Moron,bringing another child into this world when she already hates the two she has",Kagome said to teh scilence.But she knew it wasn't for the child,it was for the sex. The good hot,sex she could get from her unsuspecting victim!!

So Kagome walked out to the far side of the grounds,over to the biggest tree,way in the back.It was large,alone,graffitie cover.Unloved,unwanted.In the middle of the football feild. In the way.

Just like her.

She sat down against the trunk of the her hands across the abused bark,wondering about Sota. Had he gone home? Had he done the same as her? Was he even alive? She didn't know anymore.Her parents might have already ended his life,and it would have been her fault. It was always her fault. Everything.

"It's not my fault",she whisperd to herself,"It's not my fault".

She didn't even know what wasn't my fault,but it was. The truth was simply that it was. Whatever it was that she was talking about,it was. At least in her mind.

Soft tears fell from her eyes.

So there she was. A fourteen year old girl,with Matted ,messy,unwashed,black,hair. Wearing cotten candy pajama's,with puffy red eyes,and a tear stained face,crying herself to sleep on a tree.

un wanted. Un loved.


	2. Enter new ppl !

Chapter 2

_un wanted. un loved._

Little did she know that two eyes were watching her.

The next morning,she opened her eyes slowly. Her hair was a mess,she was in the same chothes as yesterday. She was ugly,un-mistakeable ugly,with no ability to be pretty,as even a horses ass. At least in her mind,but then her mind was a very pessimistic,gloomy place to be.

But she figured that noone would notice that she had slept there,and even if they did,they wouldn't be shocked. This wasn't the first time she had done this. She had done it at least once a week before in previous months,nothing new.

So with that,she ran her fingers through her hair,smoothing the frizz a little bit,brushed her self off,grabbed her book bag,and went off to class.

She looked down the hall,it was crouded.

'Full of critics',she thought.

But it always was,in her dreary thoughts,everywhere was. It was impossiable not to be in a room of critis. One time when she was three,her fat old Aunt Sayo had told her," Mussy,( no that's not a spelling error,she acctualy talks that way!) nobuddy takes no ( drag on cigerett ) pride in mistakes". And that time reminded her of another time. Her Mom was drunk,and she hadn't made dinner.She was eight. " GET YOU FCKIN ASS OVER HERE AND GET ME SOME FCKIN DINNER!!! I AIN'T NEVER GONNA GET LAID THIS WAY! YOU CAN'T SCREW SOMEONE HUNGRY!! YOU LITTLE MISTAKE ! I SAID GET YOU FCKIN ASS ME SOME DINNER!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes,she was convinced by now it was true. She was a mistake,and like her aunt had said,she was a mistake.

unwanted. unloved.

She was thinking about this,all these painful things,when suddently she bumped into something. She couldn't see anything cause her eyes were blurry with tears,but she heard the whole thing. Felt the whole thing. Knew damn well who it was !

"You little bitch!",the voice yelled,slapping her across the face!

Yes,it was Kikyo. She hated Kagome,the worthless girl.

"I'm- i'm sorry",Kagome apologized,not even takeing time to regester pain.She figured she was just used to it,after the beating she got from her father every time she screwed up.

"No",She refused to listen,"Your not sorry! But your gonna be by the time i'm done with you!", Kikyo screamed.

Kagome cringed.

"You pathetic,worthless",the insults continued endlessly,aklong with the slaps,punches,kicks. And before she knew it,Kagome found herself in the familiar posistion,of curled up on the floor,whimpering with hit,kick,and slap!

Untill.

"Hey you fckin bitch,what do you think your doing?".

Kagome didn't recognize the voice.It was female,and pissed,but that was all she knew.

"I'm beating this little whore up for assulting me!",Kikyo screamed," and what bissnes of it is your's?! Who the hell are you anyways?!!!!!".

"Your worst nightmare if you don't leave her alone",the voice snapped.

"And if I don't?",Kikyo barked.

Kagome wasn't sure,but Kikyo sounded a little shaken up. Kagome mently smiled,well,it was more of a smirk,but she still had her reasons. Nobody spoke to Kikyo Tamikiya that way! Nobody!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"Then i'm gonna be forced to kick your ass!".

Kagome didn't know what happned after that,she kinda blacked out,but when she woke up the halls were empty.

"Hm?",she asked,winceing in pain. Her body hurt all over,like it always did after she passed out.

"Oh,you'r awake!",the voice said startled,"Are you okay?".

"Um..yeah,i'm used to it",Kagome replied,opening her eyes.She could see that she was no longer in the hall. She was in the girls room,she could tell by the tiles and the rows of stalls.

Her books were in the corner,and her injurys were wrapped up,at least the ones that were bleeding. She looked around to find her savior.

She was a teenage girl. She had long black hair in a high ponytail,that still reached her ass. She wore red eye shadow and looked like the kinda girl you don't wanna make mad.Kinda asasin-ish. But her eyes looked soft enough,and she really was pretty.

"So,what's your name?",the girl asked,helping Kagome to sit up.

"Kagome",she managed to spit out,along with some blood,followed by some coughing.

"Damn,she really got you good! who was she? does she do thid often?",the questions came at her so quickly that she could feel the impact of their collision with her ears.

"Um..yeah she did.Her name's Kikyo,and um... yeah,she does this a lot which I usually try to avoid her.I need to work at it,now,who are you?".

"Oh yeah! I'm Sango".

"I have'nt seen you around school. Are you new?",Kagome asked.

"Yeah",Sango replied,"Me and my boyfriend".

"Oh,who is he?",Kagome asked.

"Miroku,you'l get to meet him soon,now what's your next class. I need a tour guide and the way I see it you owe me".

Kagome could tell she was jokeing,but she really did owe her.

"Um..English.you?",she asked.

"Same. Great! now I won't be alone,I don't get to be with Miroku till 3rd hour".

"Cool",Kagome said,takeing Sango's help up.

And together the two of them walked to class.

'Wow',Kagome thought, 'A friend'.

This was a new concept to her. Friends were never something that she had ever had an abundiance of. Heak, it wasn't something that she had ever had anything of! It felt good.

**Hey,sry it's so short! i'm trying to be reguklarly updated on every one of my fics. that i'm acctually continuing! so do me a favor. R&R and read my other fics and R&R and then I will write more. PROMISE !!!!**


	3. Detention part I

Chapter 3

Kagome looked up at the chalkboard.It was green,that was never going to change.It wasn't like it was going to do flips or something,so why were they forced to stare at it so intently?

But yet mr.Blubber butt,as the class called him ( his real name is Mr.Blub ) forced them to concentrate on it.

Kagome sighed,running her fingers through her badly knotted hair.it was filthy and tangled and oily and starting to smell a little.She hadn't washed it since who knows when.She hadn't had the chance.She had no water! Her parents were incapiable of paying the water bill,or electricity,or the gas,or the car bill,or the many I.O.U s that her father was constantly handiing out.Little did he know ,that a sticky note with some letters on it wasn't worth anything.And then Kagome was blamed for haveing the check bounce and then she would get slapped for saying that a sticky note wasn't a check.

That was her financial life.

She stared off into space,in the direction of the chalkboared as she ponderd these thoughts.Until of corse,a small slip of paper distracted her,breaking her from her misty trance.She unfolded tye parchment and read :

_**Kags,**_

_**this is dullsville.is blubber butt always this dull? does his ass always jiggle when he walks?**_

_**San.**_

She looked over at Sango who was silently urgeing her to write back.She smiled.she never passed notes with a friend before.She had never had a friend before.She looked back at the note,and un-capping her pen,scribbled her response :

_**San,**_

_**Yeah I agree,this is boreing.yeah,blubber butt is always this dull so get used to it,and grossly enough,his ass always jiggles.This class sucks!!!!!!!**_

_**Kag.**_

She flipped the note back to her friend,and watched as she stiffled giggles before responding.The rest of their noted went this way :

_**Kags,**_

_**Yes,but wut does it suck?**_

_**San.**_

_**San,**_

_**you are so wrong!**_

_**Kag.**_

_**Kag,**_

_**and proud of it.**_

_**San**_

_**San,**_

_**hahahahahahaha**_

_**Kags.**_

It was at that second,as Sango was about to scribble back,that Mr.Blub took it up.

"Young ladies,it'd detention for the both of you!".

The two girls sighed,and continued pasing notes as soon an he was looking the other way!

The two girls entered the detention room,Kagome feeling a bit self concous about all of the stares she was getting.There was a lot of people in detention today,and they all had their eyes plastered of the ignored,unkept,ignord,girl who happened to have all of the attention drawn to her on the day she looked the worst.She didn't feel very lucky!

Kagome sighed as she and Sango made their walk down the hall.Her nerves beating up on her insides,whoile her outsides screamed for rest..... and another ice pack.

"Kags",Sango said,useing her new name for her,"Detention is nuttin,I got a million of them at my old school,they really are no big deal".

Kagome sighed.

"Okay",she mutterd.

_'Great,my first friend is a bad person.... jusk my luck ',_ but something ade her mentaly slap herself.Sango was nice,just cause she did a lotta time in detention didn't meen nothing.But it was something pretty good to go on.

She looked up at the door as they reached it,but didn't get to stare long.Sango had decided that this was a door,not a picture show,and pushed it open.She grabbed Kagome's hand and the two of them enterd.

Kagome groaned as they walked past the teacher who collected their detention slips to look at who they were stuck with.

Koga.

Inuyasha.

The Bitch cough cough I meen Kikyo.

Miroku.

And Bobo the clown that may appere in my other fic One Of The Boys.

But here he was Bobo the clown.The totally random character,just in here cuz I want him to be!

Sango looked out over the people,"Know any of them?".

"Personally?No,do I know who they are? Yes... unfortunatly".

Sango was about to ask some more detaild questions,but didn't get the chance to.

"Oh look,little Miss Nerdy is here... what were you doing? that breathing thing again? You have gotta stop that!",Kikyo smirked,and the other's laughed.

Kagome was about to sigh again and go sit down in the back of the room,when Sango's voice was heard over the roar of laughter.

"You wanna say that again you big fat hoe?".

Kikyo sprung up.."MABY I DO!".

Sango stuck her finger in her ear and wiggled in around,"Ouch",she yelped,"jeeze,just cuz you gotta big ass mouth don't meen you gotta blow my ear drums".

Kikyo looked to the left,lookede to the right.Lookedover towards her BF,and with no help from any of them yelled,"FREAK", at the top of her lungs,and sat down.Leaving Sango in stitches at how bad her comeback was.

"C'mon Kags",she pulled her after her,"We're sitting in the front".

Kagome mentally groaned.What had she gotten herself into?


	4. Detention part II

Chapter 4

Kagome layed her head down on her desk.It wasn't like she was in any rush,she didn't wanna go home yet,she just didn't wanna be here.She would rather be hanging around the elementary school,seeing if Sota was okay.

"Kags",Sango said" What's wrong".

"Whats right?."

"Kags",Sango sighed"You'r attuitude definatly ain't right, look up a little or else youl' never get anywhere".

"You sound like my grandmother".

"Well Grannys are very smart,unless they have allzhimers ( can't spell it ) but that's not the point".

"Sango,I have things to worry bout.okay",she snapped"Now let me worry!."

Meanwhile,the two of them had drawn the attention of the rest of the detention room,all more interested in their fight and the teacher in charge of detention not realy giving a damn.

Sango stared at her newest friend.

"Does it have anything to do with te fact that you'r way too skinny and dressed funky",someone from the front row asked.

They looked over to see Inuyasha turned around in his seat looking at them.

"Inu - baby,don't associate you'r self with trash like that",Kikyo warned turning his head to her"Conetrate on me instead".She pulled his face and forced her tounge into his mouth,kissing him deeply.Well,it was pretty cold and shallow,but it had the tounge right!

Inuyasha returned the shallow liplock,but his eyes were darting across the room,settling on the dental hygene poster on the wall.

_'I wonder how many of those hygenic tips Kikyo acctaully uses?',_he wonderd,not really paying attention the girl kissing him.

Kagome turned her head.The last thing she needed to see was her two worst enemies making out.It was sickning.Expecially since that was the kind of thing she had never seen her parents do.Anyone do.It was the kind of affection that she only dreamed of seeing directed at her.But by now she nolonger cared really. She was used to not haveing pathetic things like love and affection.

She didn't bother to look deeper into his eyes,to see that it wasn't love he was feeling as her tounge danced around in his mouth.Not love at all. She was too busy studing the dental health poser on the wall.

_'I wonder how many of these Kikyo acctually uses?',_ she wonderd too.

Odd coincidence!

"Kagome",Sango yelled,snapping her fingers before the zoned-out girl's face"Kagome snap out of it answer me!."

"Huh",she replied,looking over at Sango who had now stopped snapping" What question"

"Are you alive"

"Well duh. how could I talk to you if I wasn't"

"It a rithorical question"

"Whatever...I'm fine,i'm alive,just leave me alone and let me worry"

Sango leaned back.

"What is up with you! Why are you acting like such a little bitch! Answer me or talk to me at least but don't just shut me out like you think your better than all that"

"That's not what i'm doing! Shut up if you don't understand",Kagoem snapped. She thought she had found a friend in Sango,but she guessed that was just too good to be true! But then she didn't want it to be true right now! Sango wanted answers to questions that she didn't even know of! She was demanding she tell her things she didn't want to like she understood what it was like! Well newsflash. She DIDN"T.

" I am so not better than that don't tell me what I think"

"Than what do you think! Think you've got problems! Well guess what your not the only one with problems! Deal with it and stop shutting people out"

Right now,their little yelling session and once again drawn the attention of the whole room.

"That's not it"

"Than what is it"

"I don't wanna talk about it or think about it or anything! SHUT UP",Kagome yelled,tears leaking from her eyes.And with that,she ran away,past the teacher who didn't give a damn,and out into the yard.Out into the feild. Back to the poor,abused,abandoned,unwanted,unloved,tree.Only there was a diffrence between her and the tree. The tree had her... and all she had,was a load of graffitti ruined spliters.

But once again,as she cried against the rough tree bark,she didn't notice the pair of intensly glowing eyes watching her from above.


	5. Returning home

Chapter 5

Kagome sniffled.She had been crying by the tree for about an hour and her sobs were almost dead.

She looked up into the darkening sky.She needed to get back to that hell hole she called home.She needed money and to go shopping and to see if Sota was okay.It was her job.Be the responsible one,take what her parents threw at her, look after Sota. That was her life.

Slowly,she picked herself up off the ground with the help of the tree branch above her,and uhhappily trudged home.

"Sota",she whisperd as she pushed open the front door a crack"are you home"

She lisnted closly. But all she caught was faint moaning.

"Yes",she heard someone snarl"But so am I"

Kagome gasped as she flickerd the light on,to see her father standing there.He was grinning in his druken state.After a quick survalince of the rom,she found that Sota was in the corner,breathing shallow,delayed,breaths.And I knew my fater had done it,and he planned to do the same to me.

She backed away slightly,flinching at the feel of his rough,calloused,hands on my shoulder.

"Kagome..you little bitch,where have you been for the past two days",he yelled.

"A-at school",she stammerd,slightly afraid.Sure she was used to this,it was regular,but who wasn't afraid of pain...right,there arn't many.But she figured that she would be used to it in a couple of months.But right now,she wasn't.She didn't like the pain,or the sharpness of his tone,or the hiddeous smacking noise that came from skin connection with the flesh of her cheek.

Yelping slightly,she fewl back against the wall.The same wall Sota was huddled up to.She longed to reach out and hold him,tell him everything would be okay like a good big sister,but she couldn't.She couldn't do anything,but wince at the painful blows that were pummeling her body.

"Mr.Higurashi",she pleaded" please stop."

Kagome refused to call him 'Dad',or 'Father'. As far as she was concerned he wasn't her father.He stopped being her father when he started being her abuser.When he started to hit her and beat her, he was nolonger her dad. After all,you have to love your parents,and she hated this man with a passion.Thus he was 'Mr.Higurashi.'

"Tell me",he hissed"Tell me why I should."

She could smell the fowl oder of alchohol on his breath.

"Because this inhumane you evil bastard",she spat.She couldn't help it. All her hatred for this man was bubbling and boiling to the surface!

"You little bitch",he screamed out in anger as Kagome regretted her words.But it was too late.She felt the sharp pain of the cool metal blade slicing into her skin.Pulling up her shirt,and slicing random patters along her most bruised areas.However,he didn't hesitate to make another bruise if he ran out of purple on his canvas.

Kagome bit her tounge,tears thrretning to leak from her eyes.But she wouldn't let them! No way in hell would she give him the sick sattisfaction!

And so the young teenage girl took the abuse until she passed out from blood loss,the man then leaving her in a crumpled mess swimming in her own blood,on tthe floor.Lying besides her little brother.Bith whimpering,and drawing shallow,uneven breaths.


	6. Pavement

Chapter 6

Slowly,Kagome's eyes flutterd open.She winced in pain as it returned to her with conciousness and her head swam from the blood loss.She was swimming in her own bloody pool,and was still weak.

Looking over to her side she saw that Sota wasn't there.It was clear by the foot prints that he had gone to his room upstairs and locked the door and was now slitting his wrists,trying to let the pain and disgust of being in that man's blood line,seep out through his cuts.

Kagome sighed. This was why she tried to wake up before him. If she did,she would take him to her room,bandage him up,and eliminate all sharp,or ponentially sharp objects ( such as mirrors which can be broken into sharp glass ) from his room and his reach.And then she would continue on to tending to herself and washing her grimy,bloody,bed sheets.

"Sota",she called,rapping slightly on the door with the back of her knuckles,after makeing sure her father. No., the man previously married to her stupid mother.Her stupid,desprate,slutty mother whom she hated! She hated her for marring this man,amd for haveing children for him and for leaving and dieing and for doing everything she did that had led to this horrid life she was left to live!

_'Oh sure',_ Kagome snarled,_' set me up with all this and then go and leave,go and get yourself killed! Damn you!'_

Kagome took in a deep breath,doubling over in pain from her lungs,probably a broken rib or two,before useing the door knob to steady herself and haul herself up.

_Oh well', _she shrugged it off,_ ' It's not like i'm not used to it'_

But anyways,after makeing sure her father had passed out somewhere around his bedroom floor.

"Sota",she called again,"Sota you better unlock this door."

Slowly,she heard a soft click from inside,followed by a small,thin,frame of a boy pulling it open.He stared at her,her relived smile,and caught her stares at his seemingy un-damaged wrists.

"Y-yea sis",he moved his head into something like a weak nod," No... cuts..." before his malnutritiouned body fell forward into her waiting arms. She had seen the distant look in his eyes before he blacked out.

Kagome caefully slid her acheing body into the warmth of the water in the bathtub,numbing the pain. She hissed at the small pain she still felt.But she smiled,one of her rare,never seen smiles.If you looked back through every record in the world,past the age of 5,she had never smiled.When she was 5,that was when her mother died and her father started takeing out the pain he felt on her.He missed her mom so much that he would go out and get drunk,and then be drunk and in pain and thus inflinct pain upon Kagome.Only,the external kind. That was the way it was.

But,belive it or not,here she was. A slight smile flickering across her pale face,licking at the corners of a large black eye.

She sighed again as her smile fell,leaving only her somber expression in it's place.The face of no emotion.But if you did something that nobody had ever done.If you looked into her eyes,you could see the pain and sadness.But nobody ever looked into her eyes,and they were always pointed down.

Kagome carefully lifted herself and her sore body from the water,and drug herself over to her bed where she flopped down.She glanced over at her dresser.The small one,with the two missing drawers.They wern't really missing.She knew where they went.The first time she had back talked her dad when she was 7, after 2 years of deep abuse,he had decided to punish her,as well as beat the crap outta her.And so he had taken two of the three drawers from her dresser,makeing her shove all her clothes into that first drawer.After 8 years,she had gotten used to it.

She gazed longingly at where har small ammount of clothes lay,but she couldn't bring herself to get up and go over to it.She just fell asleep on her bed.

BREEP

swack

BREEP

Smack

BREEP  
SLam?

Finally! On the third try,she finally hit the alarm clock smashed to smitherenes!Probably her happiest moment of the day. And then one of her least faveorites.Pulling her half naked body,clad only in a towel, free from the bedsheet's hold and over to get dressed.But she did.For once,she wore a blue,long sleve sweat shirt,mainly to hide the bruises and scrapes. And a pair of long bluejeans. The marks on her face she concealed in a little bit of base and powder.

Yes,the only thing her mother left behind was a large ammount of make-up in her bottem drawer beneath the sink in her bathroom. Kagome had raided it of all base and occasionally lip-wear for when she split her lips. The rest she hardly ever wore.After all, if a person was pretty,make-up would only make them more pretty,but if they were ugly they would only be ugly still.She was the last one she thought.However,she had the potential to be beaytiful,but how was she to know that when her whole life had been full of scorn,hatred and merciless insults and beatings,which fell under the catagory of scorn and hatred.

And with that,she roughly brushed her hair and pulled it down in front of her face.Then she pulled the hood of her black hoodie over her head and with it bowed,walked alone to school,Sota locked safely in her room,whilst she herself held the key.

Kagome looked up,not moveing her head,only her eyes,occasianally,but otherwise keeping her view cast downward.Somehow finding the cement sidewalk very,very interesting. It was one of those things that reminded her of herself.

The cement.While at one time pure,pretty and white ( no racial comment there! ), was now dingy,dull,gray,and hated.Full of indentations and filth coverd from being walked over constantly.And yet,nobody cared.Nobody gave a damn about an ugly piece on concrete that was the sidewalk.Just like her. She was the only one who cared about herself, except for Sota, and she was the only one that cared for this sidewalk as she used her foot to slide a chiped piece of concrete into it's right crack,filling a hole.But she knew that nobody would bother to do that for her. Nobody could take their foot and nudge the chips of her heart back into their holes to fill them up. Ha, as if anybody would want to.

She sighed as her silent tears dotted the abused pavement.

And nobody botherd to see,except for the oh s familiar pair of eyes that were shining down upon her. Unnoticed,but watching like always.

**Okay ppl! Know who the eyes are yet? If you don't,YOUR STUPID! lol not really! not really! I havent gone into detail about the eyes. If I did you could get it,but it's supposed to be mysterious. Mystery is fun! For me...**


	7. Sure,it's over,but I still remember

Chapter 7

Kagome leaned against the row of lockers.About two feet away was the door to homeroom,and about two minuets ago the bell had rang. She knew if she went in now everybodys eyes would be glued to her like flys on honey,and that was never a good thing. She didn't need their eyes on her,makeing sneed,rude comments right in front of her.They didn't care if she heard.And it wasn't like the teachers helped any.Sometimes,depending on the teacher, they made comment that were just as rude.

Kagome shudderd as a memory of her first day of sixth grade came into mind.

_ Flashback _

_A now 12 year old Kagome walked solemly into first hour. It was her first day of her first year in middle school.Her first day of classes,scheduals,and memorization to be done. And she wasn't at all looking forward to it.She didn't need these people mocking her._

_Slowly,she enterd just in time for the bell to ring.Knowing she needed to be in her seat soon,like,already, she despratly looked around for the little cards that had her name and where to sit. But she didn't see them._

_"Miss. Higurashi",The teacher said annoyed,"I would like to start the lesson,find your seat."_

_"I'd like to,but I can't find my name tag",she replied as politly as possiable.She had a thing against being rude to teachers.Well,at least at this age she did,even if now she didn't give a damn._

_The class instantly burst into roaring laughter._

_"What's so funny?",she asked despratly trying to keep the blush from her cheeks._

_"What's so funny",a boy in the front row mocked,"This is middle school,you check the chart outside... baby!."_

_Tears started to fall at the silver haired boy's ( Inuyasha's ) words.She hated this,running she let the tears fly behind her as she fled outside._

_"Look at the widdle baby!",a black haired girl who sat next to Inuyasha exclaimed,"She's crying!."_

_Everyone began to laugh again at the poor girls expense as the teacher called after her," This counts as skipping!."_

_But somehow,for some reason,Inuyasha felt a slight pang of regret as he watched her run off in tears. Just something about seeing her cry,the fact that he made her cry,he hadn't ment to.But he had a reputation and he figured thjat that would help maintain it.And he was right. But it didn't make him feel good. But O well. His rep was safe and that was all that matterd. Right?_

_Meenwhile,Kagome was sitting on the floor,leaning up against the door to the stall faceing the toilet in the girl's bathroom.She was whimpering as her tears poured,trying to contain them,but to no avail.They just poured out._

_ End Flashback _

Kagome sighed lightly as she rememberd that day.The day she had met Inuyasha,and Kikyo,the girl who sat next to him.The day school began to be hell too.The first day of the end.The day she learned how things would be for the rest of her life.The day she gave up hope.

She sniffled lightly as she fought back more tears. Why had this all happened to her? Why? She shook her head to clear the tears,clentching her eyes closed,and running off.She wouldn't go to class today.It's not like **_it _**would count as skipping. It would count as her being absent,as if she cared.

But little did she know,that her sniffles had been detected,and just as she had closed her eyes,shook her head,and ran off, someone had seen her.Someone had noticed hr crying outside of the classroom by the upstairs lockers.However,if you told her this,she wouldn't have belived that that person followed her outside,watching her,with intense gazes.

But here she was,being watched,as she sobbed against the old tree outside on the football feild. And she was heard mumbling," Why? I don't want this? Why don't I just..., e-end... end it all",through choked sobs.Suicide had never been her first choice,but it was sounding pretty good about now.

"No",she decided,"I won't,I-I... I... can't. I have to stay for Sota"

And with that,decided to use her alternitive solution.Sure,she had told sota not to,she kept him from it,she knew it wasn't good. But yet,she pulled out a pocketknife from her jacket pocket.Carefully,she raised the blade to her wrist.

She knew she couldn't,but then,what would it hurt? She didn't want Sota doing it because she refused to let him admitt defeat,give up on all hopes and dreams. But she had done that a long time ago.They had all dissapered with her smile. Now her frown and her pocket knife were here to stay.

And so she pulled down,applying pressure to the blade,slitting her wrist eaisly where her father had already slit her. It wasn't yet scabbed, but wasn't still bleeding.It was just tender and raw. Perfect. She winced at the pain,but relaxed as she felt the warm blood ooze down her lower arm,to the surprise of the eyes.The eyes watching her every desprate move. Watching and observing as she cut her wrist until it was enveloped in warm,sticky,blood. And then moved onto the next makeing more jagged cuts as she wasn't good with her left hand and her wrist was weak. And they watched she passed out from blood loss,before makeing his move.


	8. School again,why cant we just graduate?

**Okay ppl,i'm just now realizing a mistake I made,but I found a way to fix it. Now here it is. I said that her mom was a hooker and stuff,but then said she was dead. The hooker slut is her step mom okay!**

Chapter 8

Kagome opened her eyes meakly,weak from blood loss.She could feel the pain in her lower arms stinging.She looked up,to see that the sky was clear and blue above her.It wasn't gray like normal,like yesterday and somehow she found this odd. The sky being blue in this town was weird.But it was,bright and shiny.

But oh well,it was just the sky no big deal.So it was blue wasn't it supposed to be this color?She shook it off and looked down to examin her cuts,but they wern't there.Well,they were,but you had to peel back the millions of bandaids.Obviously somebody had a surplus of bandaids,but then why were they over her cuts?

She stared at them for a little while before figuring that they wern't gonna do flips or anything so she looked back up at the sky. It was still unusually blue.

She sighed and looked away,still vaugly wondering why she was coverd in more bandaids then that little dorky guy who worked at the drug store.The one that kept shaveing off his moles and zits and stuff. What was his name? Oh,Hojo! Yeah that little dorky guy.

But she,like everything else,shrugged it off and grabbed hold of the branch slightly above her to pull herself up.She looked down again,concentrating on her torn up gray sneakers.She wiggled her toes around a little in the small bit of room she had left in them and went to kick at a rock on the sidewalk she was now walking along.She scuffed the shoe before tearing a hole in the toe.It was definatly time to swipe more money from her parents.Or at least the people she was forced to live with. She had no parents.

But along the way to her hell hole,she couldn't help but let her mind wander back to the bandaid bonanza that was on her arm.Where the hell had it come from? Was it someone's idea of a joke? Was someone trying to be nice? Why?

Her mind flooded with all of these questions.

'_Oh well'_,she sighed,shakeing her head vigeriously to clear her thoughts,_' who really cares,it's a once in a life time thing.'_

She wasn't much of a beliver in miracles if you could call it that.Nope,that went KABLOOSH with all her dreams of happy things and the notions that her mother might come back for her.She ditched that when she was 10. After all,she was dead,she was never comeing back,and even if she wasn't dead after 5 years she wasn't gonna come back for her anyways. Nope,her mother didn't care,that's why she let herself die.That's why she escaped.She chose death over her only daughter.

_'You couldn't have took me with you',_Kagome wished as silent tears drew paths across her face.

_ Flashback _

_Kagome,a young 5 year old chile,ran up to the front steps of her shabby house,macaroni art in hand.She was smiling brightly cause soon she would get to show her mother her artistic ability.And then her mother would take her and they would go spend the day out somewhere before her dad came home,drunk and stoned.That way,he wouldn't hit them! Then she wouldn't have to dress in long clothes or explain the bruises! It was great._

_But recently her mother had been less enthusiastic.She would take her out,but she wouldn't play with her. If they went get ice cream,she wouldn't eat any unless Kagome offerd her a bite.But usually that wasn't often.It was gone too soon._

_If they went to the park,she would sit quietly on the bench,her frazzled hair sticking up in some places.She wouldn't play on the jungle gym like she used to or push Kagome on the swing.She just sat there,watching her daughter blankly.Sure she used to do those things,but ever since Kagome heard strange noises from upstairs one night,her mother hasn't been the same.She wouldn't tell her why.It wasn't right to tell a 5 year old that kind of thing._

_But either way Kagome loved going out with her mother. And so she wasted no time in rushing into the house not bothering not to slam the door.She slamed it loud and it shook the walls and all the pictures fell down.But she didn't notice. She was too busy looking for her mommy._

_And then she found her.She was in her room,in the small place between the bed and the wall,right below the window in the pitch black dark.Which is why she didn't notice the small girl come in.The once yelling Kagome had now quieted at her mother's strange bahavior and was stareing from across the bed.Watching it happen._

_She watched as her mother rocked back and forth,before reaching under the bed and extracting a small needle.She fumbled with it as her hands shook,but she still held onto it.She diped it into a small container of fluid filling the syrenge part.Like when the doctor gives you a shot amd fils the needle._

_' Is mommy sick? dose she need a shot? shouldn't she be at the doctor?' the small girl wonderd._

_But still interested in her mother's qbsurd behavior,she watched.She watched as her mother injected the needle into her large vein on her arm.She watched as her mother jerked violently,before falling limp face first.She watched as her mother killed herself.Suicide._

_ End Flashback _

"Why?",she whisperd to herself,now that she was older and understood what had happened.when she was a litte girl,before she knew better,there had been a million stories floating around.Some cruel,some sad,some ridiculous.But they all had something to do with her.At least all the ones she had heard.

They all knew she had killed herself.That she couldn't take it anymore,and ended it.That she had taken the cowards way out.But they never told her.Nobody would talk to her.Except her father.But all he did was yell.He yelled at her,told her it was her fault,that her mother killed herself because she hated her and wanted to get away.He sent her up to her room crying,forced her to take the shots she was so afraid of at the doctor. She was terrified then.

And the awful thing was he enjoyed it.He never cared about her health before.But now that she was afraid of the needles,he took her for check ups constantly.Just to force her into getting a shot.And always she cried as he threw her lollypop to the ground,crushing it with his foot,before takeing her home and beating her.

He had stopped that as she got older.Learned about everything.Read old newspapers in the library,the obituaries.Watched old news shows.Figured out what went on,and learned about what happened in yher mother's room that night.A week before her death when she broke.She learned all about her father rapeing her mother.Over and over,hitting her,getting help.Allowing hois friends to take her.Filling her every opening.Tearing her.And then throwing her out the room and down the stairs into the kitchen.Everything that broke her mother was hos fault.But she couldn't help but hate her mother too.

"Why didn't you take me with you? or why didn't you take me and leave? You didn't have to break? Why did you marry him? Why didn't you kill him! WHY DIDN'T YOU DO SOMETHING!"

She couldn't help the increase in her volume,as she broke down on her porch crying.Her father wasn't home now,he was out with someone.Probably haveing sex with two strippers at once or something at a bar.Either way,if Sota wasn't home she was alone.

Her tears dotted the cold concrete of the porch.they fell and fell and she couldn't hold them back.It was impossiable! Why hadn't her mother done more? Why had she just sat back and let him do that to her? Why? Why did she marry him? Why? She was stupid! She was a stupid bitch leaving her children like that.

( A/N : Okay ppl. your probably wondering where Sota is during all of this? Well he was at her sister's house.She couldn't handel an abusive rapeist husband,a 5 year old,and a two year old baby.So she sent Sota to her sister to raise.But after she died her sister decided she didn't want anything to do with him and sent him home where Kagome served as his older sister and his mother )

She hit the pavement with her fist! She was sick of it! She was sick of hateing her mother! She was sick of haveing a stupid bitch for a mother who chose her own peace in death before her children.She wanted her mother to be better. But she wasn't.

And thus,she abused the pavement,takeing out all her anger,and energy on it before slipping away into sweet unconciousness.The eyes,watching like always.

Kagome groaned as she felt someone shakeing her,as well as the cold nipping at her wet clothes.And she was baffled and confused and tired all at once which ended up wither her opening her eyes looking really stupid.And then sneezing.

"What the?",she asked,looking for who was shakeing her.She looked up into Sota's brown eeyes.He looked really worried.

"lil bro? Wazzup?",she asked,looking down at her sopping clothes," what happened?"

"I'm sorry I was scared!",he screamed throwing himself on her,earning a loud scream from her part as pain enveloped her body.Quickly her fell off her full of apologies.

"Just tell me what the hell happened",she groaned at the pain shooting through her limbs.

"Well",Sota began explaining,guilt drippuing from his every word," It was late.I heard you screaming outside,and figured you went into another fit of anger at ... her... and so I ran outside to calm you down.But that was after I gatherd up the courage too,you get kinda violent in your little fits and so by the time I got there you were passed out,I tried to wake you up but you were too far gone,and so I tried to drag you up to your room but even though you barely weigh anything cause we don't eat very much,I'm not very strong cause of that very reason! So I couldn't even get ylou off of the door before dad got home. i'm sorry I got scared he was stoned and drunk and had Kena with him ( their step mom ) and I was scared so I ran.They got mad at you cause you were in their way so they beat you and I was really sorry and I was crying bit I ran to my room and hid until they wen't to his room.But then I was scared to move you I doidn't wanna hurt you more!".

He was completely in tears now crying openly.he could do that.Kagome didn't cry that openly,with loud sobs unless something was very wrong.

"Sota chill,I know he's an evil bastard and I don't blame you okay sweetie? just help me get upstairs so I can get dressed.I'm guessing it rained last night?"

He nodded and she snuffed up her runny nose back to wherever your snot goes when you suck it up back into your nose.And so with the help of her spastic,worried,brother,she got back into her room and threw on her other shirt.A red one.A dark blood red color.She then quickly ran a brush through her hair,despite the fact that it didn't do anything cause her hair was too screwed up from sleping with it wet.And that it was only raining for a little while,like the first hour or so and so it dried that was.Jacked up majorly!

But it's not ike it matterd.she wasn't trying out for anything.She was just returning to school so that she could be friendless.She didn't have Sango,if anything Sango was another enemy.She could add her to her list of people to take abuse from.

Kikyo

Inuyasha

Koga

and now..Sango.

Somehow it hurt to think about that.

But nonetheless,she trudged along the walk that she had just come from last night.Dejavu.But Hey,she got to escape from her world of physical abuse from her father,responsibility of her brother,regrett,hatred of her mother,and Kena. She got to go to a world of abuse from other people her age, foul language and hateful things,still the responsibility of worrying about Sota,and the hatred of her mother.She had the loneleness here.

Which was worse? Even she didn't know.And she still didn't as she enterd the classroom.Tripped over Kikyo's foot,falling into Koga's sexually harassing arms.Watched Inuyasha's annoying evil smirk,as he apered to be enjoying the show,until the teacher came in.They then dropped her on the floor,Koga takeing peeks up her skirt,and then the teacher told her to get her dirty ass up off the floor she was messing it up.And threw a pincel at her.It hoit her square between the eyes as she pulled herself up off the floor,useing her desk to pull herself up.

But the desk didn't hold,toppeling over dropping on her back.On her bruse,makeing her scream out in pain.Causeing Inuyasha to flintch dur to his sensitive ears.And maybe, just a little regret,like on the first day of sixth grade. But like that day he made up for it by laughing at her with his friends.But evenyually,her tears started to stream down her cheeks again as she failed to lift the desk off her.

Once again,Inuyasha couldn't help but feel a little pang of regret.He hated seing wemon cry.

"Cry baby!"Kikyo shouted,getting a roar of laughter from the class.

"Feh",Inuyasha snorted ,"This is stupid",he reached over and pulled the desk off of her," Stupid weak wench "

This got more laughs,and he sat back down.Kikyo started suffocateig him in kisses again.But hey,his rep was till in one piece. And that was all that matterd..right.

But as Kikyo reached her hand up his shirt to play with his abs and pecs,he couldn't helop but glance back at the whimpering girl,running her fingers along her back gingerly,a bruise no doubtly forming on her sore back,to match the one on her tender,abused skin, between her eyes from the pincel.


	9. I finaly updated!

Chapter 9

Kagome sighed as the teacher droned on and on about something including pie? or was it pi? ir was it something with that wooden teeth guy? Heck! She didn't know! And frankly,she didn't care.It wasn't like this was home Ec.. they didn't need to know about pie! And this wasn't math so who gave a flipping damn about pi or 3.14 ( I'm smart ) and nobody really cared about some dead guy.

Oh well,this was probably the happiest time of her day.She was sitting here staring at a blackboard.Trying to figure out why it was called a black board if it was green,and not really paying attention to the lesson.

Meanwhile... 

Inuyasha was staring aimlessly at the back of Kikyo's head seeing as she sat in front of him.At the moment he was wishing she would do something with her hair...like wash it.He glanced over to a half asleep Kagome.

' her hair is really shiny,i wonder if she washes it?... no! Bad Inuyasha! I don't care about her! it's the boredom talking!'

And yet he couldn't draw his eyes away.he was busy studying her features.Her small nose,pale skin,way to skinny,bruises everywhere, and her stormy blue eyes seemed cold and lifeless.But deeper in them he could detect sadness,pain, and the way she winced every time she inhaled.He soon found himself wondering why. Then noticing the blood seeping through her shirt in many places,her back had a rather large blood stain,her ribs had a few on her sleeves.Old wounds that the desk had reopened. And he wondered why?

But of course,he did back slap himself after the class had left for giving a rat's ass about the stupid homely chick.And so with these thought's shunned,he followed after his little slutty bitch.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Kagome sighed.It was5th hour,and yet she was totally broke.She had no money nope zip nada zelch.And it was lunchtime too.

And so she took her out an orange folder full of paper and dug her pencil from her jacket pocket,and headed off to the tree.The old one that reminded her of herself.She always spent lunch there,alone,why was it any different if she didn't have food.

Either way, the point was that she was now sitting by her lonely tree. She herself feeling equally lonely.

Carefully she leaned back against the tree trunk.She opened her folder and began to sketch roughly.Here eyes weren't even really focused too hard on the paper.She was looking at it, but wasn't seeing it.She was looking right through it at her knees as she viciously attacked the paper with her pencil.

After a little while,she looked down at her paper,broken from her trance and able to see her picture.She was able to take in the depth of her sketch in all of it's tear stained beauty...or whatever it was.It wasn't what she'd call a happy picture.

It was of a little girl,with her hair down to her shoulders. She had bangs gliding down to her lower cheekbones on both her left and right side of her face. She had big,stormy blue eyes,her mouth drawn in a slight frown,her eyes glistening with unshed tears. She was sitting on her bed, her seven year old body bleeding from her wrists.A knife was in her other hand and she immediately recognized it. It was her eight years ago. The night she gave up all hope.

So no. It wasn't at all a happy picture.And the tear stains didn't help.But they kept falling.Falling in big hot blobs splattering on her paper smearing the horrid sketch,but not enough.

She crumpled it up,tossing it aside over her shoulder,and began to cry,her face buried into her knees.Her frail weak body wracking in loud sobs.There was no point in trying to conceal it.All beneath the watch of the eyes.The eyes that watched her through all of her miserable suffering,wanting it to stop.Wanting to just go down there and give her one of those lifesaving hugs she so desperately needed right now.But all he could do was wait up there in the branches while she cried.

( A/N: okay now things have gotten obvious but I had to do it )

**Okay ppl! Wazzup? i'm sry about the whole deal with 365,for those of you who read it and if u don't you should! But I need to put it back up! They took it down! I have something important to tell you first though! GO CHECK OUT MY PROFILE! I USE IT LIKE A MESSAGE BOARD SO IF U EVER HAVE ANY QUESTIONS CHECK IT.IT MAY ANSWER YOUR QUESTIONS!**


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